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The Bard's 100 Best Soccer Players: Kaka (#97)

KakáThe Pick: I love Kaka. I know he will be way higher on this list by the time his career is over, and I only put him down this low because my formula probably puts too much emphasis on one’s career stats, and Kaka’s career is far from over. But, even in the short time that he has been plying his trade as one of the world’s elite male soccer players, he has already won the 2007 Ballon d’Or, a Serie A title, and a World Cup. So, why isn’t he higher up on this list?

The Flick: Well, most of the guys who inhabit the top of my list have been heroes, and – while Kaka was on the team that won the 2002 title – he only played 25 minutes in that tourney. Once he contributes to Brazil winning a World Cup (and I’d bet on that), he will vault up these rankings. What actor just needs one Oscar to cement his status as a legend? Well, it’s the same man I would get to play Kaka (but I would need the 1972 version). Al Pacino.

The Limerick: Wait, Al won for Scent of a Woman? Hoo-ah! Commence poetry:

Although his immaculate skills Brazil’s 2002 title did not beget

Kaka may be reserving his skills for future Cups we won’t forget

Many titles he will hoard

All in the name of the Lord

And unlike Tiger & Thierry, he is the best a man can get

Creative Commons License photo credit: fortes

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