≡ Menu

SATO Wednesday WAG: Maria Mazza (11/25)

The Beauty: Maria Mazza has the right recipe for success as a WAG. First, become a smoking hot model. Check. Next, finish near the top of a beauty pageant, like Miss . Check. Third, appear in terrible films. Check (but you shouldn’t check them out). Fourth and finally, bag a soccer star. Check. Thus, Miss Maria Mazza has all of the right ingredients to be the perfect WAG. And – when it comes to looks alone – I think Maria may be Italy’s finest.  

The Beast: Which played snagged Miss Mazza? Why, it was Francesco Totti, of course. He’s played for for almost 20 years, a span over which he has scored nearly 200 goals. He was also a fixture for the Italian Nats until his retirement from international play in 2007. Of course, the year prior he had played a huge role in Italy’s win, and he was even named to the all-star team for his performance. He’s so good (and rich), he dumped Mazza.  

The Bard: Maria deserves an epic love sonnet, but I ain’t got the time or talent:

Let me tell you the love story of Maria Mazza and Francesco Totti.

It is the story about one of the world’s soccer stars & his hottie.

Totti kicked Maria to the curb though, preferring another girl.  

While Miss Mazza is majestic, Ilary Blasi makes one’s head swirl.

Still, I must say that I think anyone who would dump Maria is crazy.

I guess when you’re Totti, sometimes your mind can get hazy.