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SATO Celebrity Faceoff: Robert De Niro VS Marlon Brando

 Weeks ago, Robert De Niro was ruled SATO’s Godfather of Football for his faceoff victory over ranting and raving madman, Al Pacino.  But what about Brando?  After all both men’s most legendary acting role is the same character, Don Vito Corleone AKA the Godfather.  So which method actor would make the better Serie A football player?  The SATO debates.



Tale of the Tape

Robert De Niro         Works: Raging Bull, Taxi Driver, Casino

Height: 5″10     Hometown: New York, NY     Awards: 2 Oscars, 4 Noms

De Niro, much like Marlon Brando, is known in his early days for acting in tough, gritty roles where often the lead character was considered a rebel or even anti-hero.  De Niro channeled this tough guy acting style into many mobster hit films (The Godfather II, Goodfellas, Casino, The Untouchables).  Still today he is considered one of the toughest men in Hollywood.  The majority of De Niro’s roles are guys you want on your football team.  Lately though Mr. De Niro has dabbled with more goofy roles then before.

Marlon Brando     Works: Streetcar Named Desire, Apocalypse Now, GF

Height: 5’9     Hometown: Omaha, NE     Awards: 2 Oscars, 6 Noms

Brando is considered one of the best actors ever.  Most film critics credit the On the Waterfront actor with inventing method acting.  When Brando took on a part he fully embraced it and once the film wrapped the actor would drop the part and was ready to move on to something completely new.  Brando was supposedily summoned to be in the Godfather sequel, but refused because he no longer connected with the role.  With exorbitant salary demands and a constant desire for a new challenging role, Brando would likely be a perfect fit for Real Madrid

The Result

We have to choose Brando.  I mean the guy fathered Superman.  Plus he showed great leadership potential in his role in Apocalypse Now.  Those jungle natives really looked up to his character, Colonel Kurtz.  And besides Brando is the man.  The guy has like 8 thousand Bill Brasky stories.  For example he was expelled from his high school for riding a motorcycle through the hallway.  He once branded himself to express his sympathy for slavery.  He used to eat 5 gallon tubs of ice cream in a sitting.  He hid his best friend’s ashes in his closet and talked to him everyday.  And my personal favorite, he married two women that were in the same movie, Mutiny on the Bounty.  One was in the 1935 version and the other was in the 1961 remake.      

Our apologies to Mr. De Niro.  I must admit our opinion of the Raging Bull has been recently swayed when I discovered this clip of the Taxi Driver.  It’s from the film Stardust and De Niro plays Captain Shakespeare.    


As you can see from 1:10 to 1:17 De Niro has clearly lost his mind and has been reduced to dancing around in a dress for kids movies.  Brando would have never approved of such a thing. 

Dancing around in a dress at home with a 5 gallon tub of ice cream is another story for Mr. Brando though…