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North Korean Team Forced to Sit in Time Out Corner

DMZIf you have ever seen the South Park creators puppeteer film Team America then you already know just how evil a dude North Korean dictator Kim Jong-il can be. So if you play for the guy’s national team and you just returned home from a three consecutive loss beat down at the World Cup then you know that you are in some deep trouble.

In fact if I was on the team and I had to meet with the almighty one then I would check the flooring underneath my feet. You never know when the man with the thick-rimmed glasses might pull a secret lever that opens up a hatch and sends you into the shark-infested fish tank along with your teammates. And considering how badly the North Koreans lost their last two matches after a hopeful start against Brazil, I think it is safe to say that Kim Jong-il was pretty much pissed off at his side‘s Cup experience.

And I didn’t find it to be the least bit surprising that recently it was reported that the entire team (minus their best two players who play in Japan) was reprimanded in a private six hour meeting last week. Kim Jong-il apparently blamed the coach for the side’s poor effort and even claimed that the result was an act of “betrayal” to his son and heir apparent Kim Jong-un.

Of course it was wrongly publicized that the North Korean side would physically have to go to the coalmines to pay back their debt for a poor showing at the World Cup and some sites even produced a photo shop picture of a player in mining gear, but in reality the team had not had any alleged punishments intact until this most recent report of the six hour secret tirade by the nation’s leader in front of 100‘s of government officials and athletes.

And although it was a disappointing Cup for North Korea it was quite obvious that their group draw made any hope of advancing to the second round non-existent. And that is easy for everybody in the world to understand, but one extremely lonely (pronounced ronry) maniac.

Creative Commons License photo credit: ninjawil