This just in. Landon Donovan’s penalty kick has landed.
That’s right folks, the ball that was launched into orbit on November 22nd, 2009 by America’s best player, Donovan, has apparently landed near a corn field in Lincoln, Nebraska on Thursday December 17th, 2009.
The penalty kick was taken by the national team captain following extra time during the MLS Cup final and the misfired kick was last seen quickly exiting Qwest Field in Seattle, WA. Much like a rocket ship being launched into the great black abyss known as outer space, many believed they had seen Landon’s kick for the last time as it soared away into the sky vanishing.
Farmer Billy Bob Arbuckle Jr. discovered the soaring soccer ball as he sat on his porch smoking his pipe and looking up at the sky. Here is what Arbuckle Jr. had to say regarding the discovery:
Well I was sitting here on the porch watching the stars when all of a sudden I see an image that looks like that of a comet. It keeps soaring closer and closer and then BAM! The damn thing hits right into my barn blowing a hole through one of the barn doors. Imagine that.
Hundreds of other Midwesterners are now coming forward and claiming to have seen a similar sight flash across the sky. Many thought it was simply a comet or some type of unknown extraterrestrial life, but few believed that it was in reality a soccer ball.
Fortunately, no one involved in the sighting was hurt and the barn in which the ball landed had been abandoned for many years. But warning signs of similar acts are now being posted all over the United States and in South Africa as well. Be careful about when you decide to go outside this summer.
Objects may fall from the sky.