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2010 World Cup Preview: Germany

Soccer WM 2006
Creative Commons License photo credit: Uwe Hermann

The Team: Germans are nice folks, but students of history will tell you to be wary of the “Krauts”, as Walter from The Big Lebowski would call them. After all, those gregarious Germans did stir up a lot of trouble last century, what with their constant desire for world domination and all. Luckily, we kept those sausage loving sons-of-bitches from forcing us all to speak their truly ugly language (it may be the world’s toughest to listen to). But what about their soccer side?

The Cream: Their teams have always been strong (even when they were divided by a wall), and they are looking like darkhorse candidates to hoist the 2010 World Cup in South Africa. They have much to feel confident about. They cruised through qualifying (while surviving Tom Cruise’s Valkyrie). They overcame many obstacles due to the thrilling play of their several stars, including Klose, Ballack and Podolski. These Krauts can play the beautiful game. 

The Dream: Remember when I said I hate the German language? Well, its because – like the Dutch – they decide to make their words way too damn long. Take the “German National Football Team”. Sounds good in English right? Now, let’s see the translation in German: “Die Deutsche Futballnationalmannschaft.” Um, I don’t know about you, but I don’t think you can put “die”, “douche” and “man shaft” in the same sentence. Maybe I am just lost in translation, but I don’t think Germany will win it all at the World Cup. In fact, I’ll put the odds that they win the 2010 World Cup at 15:1.

{ 5 comments… add one }
  • The Yank February 2, 2010, 11:23 am

    oh, and if you want to cite definitions, don’t you think you should use a standard dictionary instead of some public health service provider in the UK? keep reading bud, but please, stop trolling…


  • The Yank February 2, 2010, 11:12 am

    wow bud. you need to relax. as someone who practices law, i can tell you that the legal definition of racism in the us would not include ethnicity, that’s why we say you can’t discriminate against someone due to race, ethnicity or national origin. national origin is where the germans would be, but you go ahead and find one site that says differently and cite it. you should write for wikipedia. if you read my stuff over the long run, you would see i am capable of a cogent article every now and again, but most of the time i am just having fun. just like i was having fun with you about the “racist” thing. and you say i am the one getting “worked up”. again, thanks for reading…

  • A Football Loving Kraut February 2, 2010, 8:36 am

    ‘Racism is where prejudice combines with power to inform any attitude, action or institutional structure which subordinates a person because of colour, race or ETHNIC difference.’

    Ethnicity refers to social groups who share a cultural heritage with a common language, values, religion, customs and attitudes. It is distinct from race, which is based on differences in outward appearance, such as skin colour.

    Therefore Germans can be classified as an ethnicity and therefore you CAN be racist against Germans.
    I got my definitions from http://www.bristolpct.nhs.uk/theTrust/Equality/Race/glossary.asp.

    Take my constructive criticism with a pinch of salt if you will, you don’t have to care what I say. Though, once again I reiterate if you ever intend to write good football articles you should focus on the football aspect, not get worked up about one specific detail in my comment. I challenge you sir, to write a good football article on anything you feel passionate on, maybe an in-depth analysis of the USA team and their chances? We don’t get many of those.

    The Ignorant Football Loving Kraut.

  • The Yank February 1, 2010, 9:58 pm

    thanks for the feedback! you hit the nail on the head. i am ignorant. you appear to be as well, since one cannot be “racist” against germans. prejudiced against them because of their nationality, yes. but “racist”? nope. well, not unless you guys are all white and have absolutely no minorities. oh yeah, didn’t you try to get to that point once? ah, i kid. thanks for reading!

  • A Football Loving Kraut February 1, 2010, 10:57 am

    This article says absolutely nothing about Germany’s chances, more than half of it is a rant being racist against or generally dissing Germans. You don’t delve into the football aspect at all apart from mentioning we have three star players in Klose, Ballack & Podolski. If you’re trying to be funny; you’re not. Just ignorant. Learn to translate or copy and paste off Wikipedia properly, because only ‘die’ is in ‘Die deutsche Fußballnationalmannschaft’. I’m assuming your American, cause your pen name is ‘The Yank’. I personally like Donovan and Howard, so I wish the USA the best of luck in the World Cup. Though, quite frankly sir, you can’t write a football article for s***. So stick with whatever you’re good at, because the odds I give you of ever writing a decent football article aren’t very favorable.

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